“Peace is not the absence of conflict...

...But the presence of creative alternatives for responding to conflict.”

On the eve of the anniversary of our nation’s independence, Dorothy Thompson’s words seemed an appropriate introduction to this month’s leadership topic – Managing Conflict. Much like our founding fathers managed conflict to achieve independence, so too must today’s leaders be prepared to manage conflict in their organizations to achieve their desired results. Conflict is defined as an interaction between interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals or interference from others in achieving their goals. The key aspects for leaders to key in on are the level of interdependence between the parties involved and the foundation of each other’s perceptions. Establishing this level of interdependence helps leaders address the conflict in the context of the relationships involved. Addressing the perceptions by all parties enables leaders to understand the issues in the context of the facts of the conflict.

At the root of these two challenges is effective communication. Communication contributes to both the cause and the cure of conflict. Conflict typically shows itself in the absence of effective communication, creating misperceptions and information vacuums. Effective communication is a key catalyst to cure a conflict with the ability to bring parties together to understand the importance of the interdependent relationships, fill information voids and reset perceptions to their proper levels. A Leader’s ability to step into any conflict situation and effectively communicate to all parties can be the difference between success and failure, but not all Leaders are the same and not all Leaders manage conflict the same way.
Ralph H. Kilmann and Kenneth W. Thomas identified 5 specific Conflict Management styles based on their research in the early ‘70’s. The five styles are based on how aggressively one pursues their own goals against how aggressively they cooperate with the other parties in the conflict. The five styles are typically represented on a 2x2 grid with Assertiveness & Cooperativeness as the axis identifiers. The five styles are:

• Avoidance – Low Assertiveness, Low Cooperativeness
• Accommodation – Low Assertiveness, High Cooperativeness
• Compromise – Medium Assertiveness, Medium Cooperativeness
• Competition – High Assertiveness, Low Cooperativeness
• Collaboration – High Assertiveness, High Cooperativeness

As you can imagine, each style carries with it a unique set of skills, both communication and others, which may or may not be the Leader’s strength. I have worked with Leaders with all five natural styles to either complement their style with mine and/or to help them adjust their style to better achieve their desired results.

At no point have we discussed eliminating conflict. Lyle E. Schaller once said, “The easiest, the most tempting, and the least creative response to conflict within an organization is to pretend it does not exist”. As leaders, we must all recognize conflict will always exist and learn to effectively manage it through effective communication and awareness of our natural management style. How are you achieving peace in your organization?

Lead Well!